


Fragment from a Lost Diary

by sweetcarolanne



Category: Carmilla - J. Sheridan Le Fanu
Genre: Childhood, Deathfic, Emotionally Repressed, F/F, Gen, Internalized Homophobia, Lies, Mother-Daughter Relationship, Motherhood, Nightmares, Religious Imagery & Symbolism, Seduction, Sexual Repression, Vampires
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-17
Updated: 2014-10-17
Packaged: 2018-02-21 13:57:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2470685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweetcarolanne/pseuds/sweetcarolanne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The last known writings of Laura that shed some light on her untimely death...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fragment from a Lost Diary

**Author's Note:**

  * For [KannaOphelia](https://archiveofourown.org/users/KannaOphelia/gifts).



> Written for KannaOphelia. I saw your prompt and couldn't resist having a go at answering some of the questions you had about Bertha Rheinfeldt, Madame la Comtesse and Laura's death. I hope you enjoy my attempt at this fandom that is a beloved one of mine, but is one that I have never tried to write before!
> 
> Thank you for the beautiful prompt! :)
> 
> Not my assignment, but an extra "trick" just for fun!

It has happened again. I wish to God it had not, but it has. I was lonely and vulnerable, saddened beyond belief by my losses, thinking of my youth and remembering in my slumbers the time I thought I had found love for the first time.

The fever swept upon our community as if it were the plague of olden times. I sickened, but survived; however, I awoke from my heated sleeping and convulsions to find my beloved husband and almost his entire family had already left this world. I give my heartfelt thanks to the angels that my darling daughter has survived; yesterday I arranged for my precious Anna to be delivered into the care of my father and my former governesses. I pray that this time will be but a brief dark spot among her youthful memories. Would to God that I too could forget!

Bereft of my loved ones' company, I was weak. I allowed the girl to come to me, to become the dear companion of my darkest hours. I was a fool, but she seduced me by being so unlike the Carmilla of my early days. She was no languorous dark beauty, but bright and blonde and rosy like myself in girlhood. To my naive mind, her smile was sweet and her intentions pure. She called herself Marie, and said she was a cousin of my late husband's. Aching and alone, I saw her words as truth. She pressed no strange affections on me, but was kind and patient. She sat by my side and read to me; every waking hour was met by her sweet smile, and she told me that all would be well, that I would find joy in this life and the next, and that my girl-child would be granted strength and happiness far beyond the three years she has so far spent upon this earth. With a beaming glow upon her face, Marie informed me that few queens could ever aspire to the greatness that my little girl would some day be able to claim for her very own.

I saw no eerie prophecy in her words at first, merely the kindness of a relative and friend.

But with Marie's arrival, the terrifying dreams of my youth have returned again. The skulking cat in the shadows every night, and the terrifying sensation of two needles piercing my tender breast! In the distance as I sleep, I hear the voice of the woman that General Spielsdorf had called Madame la Comtesse. Echoing all that Marie had spoken, assuring me that everything will be perfect, and that death is but a passing moment, and nothing to be feared.

I am fading fast, and with every waking moment I am sobbing, whispering or shrieking prayers for my soul. Papa said to me when I was younger that he was glad that I had never known the General's niece, Mademoiselle Bertha Rheinfeldt. He was completely right, of course. It was a fortunate thing that I had not met her back in those days. Alas, I know her now all too well!

It was the fault of neither Papa nor General Spielsdorf that they never told me that Marie was Bertha's middle name!


End file.
